My brain says no but my pants say off.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
