You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
