i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
