Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
