Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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