love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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