I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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