How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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