I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize