bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He did a backflip because drugs
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
