Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
