I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
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