Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize