Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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