what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
