I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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