That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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