He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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