no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
