he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
