my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
