If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
i think im in europe. pls send help
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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