It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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