It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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