it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
