Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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