K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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