Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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