it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
