D3 body, D1 cock
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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