when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
