oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
