and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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