nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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