so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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