I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
