I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
