and my herpes radar will keep us safe
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
