I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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