What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
