Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Randomize