Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
