I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
she peed on how many people?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
