you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Boobs are out for the taking
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
