susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
