I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
