I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just had sex on a roof
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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