I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
