Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Help. Why am I so naked?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
