Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Pooping to opera.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
